Sometimes things just do not go as planned, and have to face a break. Pain and suffering period are highly variable from person to person, the intensity of the relationship, the duration of it. Also strongly it influences the fact that the decision to separate was yours, mutual or just your partner. In the latter case there is often a feeling of abandonment that amplifies the loss.
A separation affects our perception of ourselves. And the more serious was the relationship with the other person, the greater the identity crisis. There is a period of mourning inevitable with feelings of abandonment, fear of the future … a process that must pass, which takes us from “we” to “I” is. And you can change the chip from one day to another, because although we have not noticed, the other person was present in many of our customs and future plans, to a greater or lesser extent. Only with time can be redirecting our lives to a “single” mode.
There are no miracle solutions to avoid any pain or make us forget the other immediately. But there are things that can be done to make the process less painful and faster. I’ve listed some below…
Sadness or helplessness cannot be excuses to abandon. If one aspect of your life is not going through a good time in this case love would be a mistake to neglect other fundamental pillars, especially the issue of health. So, whether you were taking care of yourself or not, at the time of a break you have to.
What I mean by take care of yourself? Well what I write in this blog for years: eat healthy and exercise. Physical well – being of a balanced diet coupled with exercise is a way to feel better also the psychological level. In addition, the sport generates endorphins, which make you feel good. And tired, so you sleep better at night, and do not you stay hours thinking about what could have happened or why it happened to you just to you.
Free time can be dangerous during a break, because you can be too long ruminating thoughts negative. Eye! I’m not saying you have to cancel any thoughts and take care at all costs. You also need to reflect, define your goals, and rebuild your life. But you also need to distract yourself, and it is best to be busy. Try searching for a balance between work, fun, sport, and other activities, nor is becoming a workaholic or sport to compensate. The goal is to just disconnect.
Do things you like
Another important tip is to enjoy the small and big things of life. Unfortunately, no one can avoid some tasks or activities that do not like, but you can choose to many that if you like. We all have our passions and our tastes. You like to travel? Eat well? The concerts? No matter what you like: do it and give yourself a whim. Do you remember those things you like but you did not do because your partner did not like? You have no reason to stop them.
A separation is an opportunity to open up to the world and meet new people. And I do not mean to potential partners, but simply to connect with people, and enriched by the exchange of ideas and experiences. Make new friends, or retakes relationships that you left because you had cooled focused on your partner.
Also, take advantage you have close people who love you and care about you to be with them and enjoy their company. You can also talk to them about what happens to you and what you feel, provided you can keep the measure. Nobody wants to hear someone else complain and always complain about the same issues. Do not keep things, speaks. You’ll see what happens to you has happened to many more people, and maybe you can give some good advice. But most important is that you lose the weight you’ve been telling it to a friend’s ear.
You may also like to read another article on CarolineJoyBlog: Relationships at work
Think about your achievements
The last tip I want to share with you is that occasionally think of everything you’ve accomplished in your life. This is an exercise specially dedicated to destroying the victim and defeatist thinking. Things may not have gone well this time, but on many more occasions triumphed and return to do so. Do not be blinded.
Time heals all
Perhaps the most heard phrase when you go through a loving disappointment. But usually true. If you are active and retake your life, deciding what your priorities and goals, are taking care of yourself, socializing, having new experiences, gradually redefine your personality, at the same time will create new positive memories. The break, the sense of loss, gradually lose intensity, until one day you realize that what happened allowed you to be the person you are and advance your way. Perhaps at this moment you meet someone, maybe not ever have a partner, it will not matter, because you’ll be happy as you are.